Time to Flee

I HATE BEING SHY. 

It is my worst quality, but it's also who I am. I had a job interview today for a waitress position and I feel like it was a slow motion train wreck. I'm awkward. I'M SHY. I'm not very confident. To top it all off, my biggest insecurity right now is talking about school and the interviewer drilled me on it. She couldn't even fathom why I would be doing what I'm doing for school: online classes and one french class at a city community college rather than continuing at UIC. 

RANTRANTRANTRANTRANT

I feel like I made the right decision for education and financial reasons to take a few courses, especially since I am so lost in life. Her look said otherwise:

YOU'RE TOO SHY. HOW CAN YOU WORK HERE WHEN YOU FAIL AT LIFE. INTERVIEW:FAILED.

awesome start to the day.

Time to flee the country. I want a redo somewhere else. 

let's go,

cxs

      p.s. I like this. "give up defining yourself - to yourself or to others. you won’t die. you will come to life. and don’t be concerned with how others define you. when they define you, they are limiting themselves, so it’s their problem. whenever you interact with people, don’t be there primarily as a function or a role, but as the field of conscious presence. you can only lose something that you have, but you cannot lose something that you are."

—eckhart tolle